Can you honestly say your love has NEVER failed?
I certainly can't. Being a homeschool mom of three with an active toddler, a portrait photographer, wife, small business owner and daughter of an aging parent I cannot say my love has never failed.
If I can be really open and honest, it has failed miserably at times. I love my family feircly, truly I do. Here comes the but... but my emotions, anxiety, expectations get the best of me. Adulting gets the best of me. I am amazed at how many times a day I utter the phrase, "I can't" but I expect my kids to always be on top of their game and say, "I can." WHY??? Fail.
Am I patient enough? NO! Am I kind enough? NO! Am I being and modeling exactly the adult I want them to grow into? NO! The truth is, I feel guilty about it every single day. I don't even know the answer or how to get there but I keep praying it will happen and that grace will absolutely cover it all. I keep trying and I don't lose hope through all the struggles. This is only the smallest piece of my struggles at being a mom and small business owner WHILE homeschooling. It's sheer insanity but I am doing my best because I feel led to give my all to my kids and my business. Part of my calling is to speak into the lives of women and so I continue to pour passion and life into others all while trying to pour life into my babies. Truth is I forget about pouring life into myself and that's just being real.
I pray God gives me what I need for today. I pray God provides for my family and that he provides wisdom, love knowledge and grace abundantly. I pray that he continues to provide clients who want what I offer and feel completely blessed by it. I need prayer every day and I know other moms do too. If you agree and benefit from these posts, just follow my page and I will keep them coming. Blessings.